Grief and Loss: Understanding the Impact, the Process, and How We Learn to Live With It.

Grief is not something we “get over.”

It is something we learn to carry.

Loss comes in many forms, the death of a loved one, the end of a relationship, the loss of health, identity, safety, or a life we thought we would have. Grief doesn’t follow rules or timelines, and it doesn’t look the same for everyone.

This blog explores what grief is, how it affects us emotionally and physically, the grief cycle, and how we can begin to care for ourselves through loss.

What Is Grief?

Grief is a natural response to loss. It is the emotional, psychological, physical, and sometimes spiritual reaction to something or someone important being taken away.

Grief can show up as:

   •   sadness or numbness

   •   anger or guilt

   •   anxiety or fear

   •   exhaustion

   •   confusion or disbelief

   •   longing or yearning

There is no “right” way to grieve.

And there is no fixed end point.

The Impact of Grief and Loss

Grief affects the whole person, not just emotions.

Emotional Impact

   •   intense sadness or emptiness

   •   mood swings

   •   irritability or anger

   •   feelings of guilt or regret

   •   loss of pleasure or motivation

Physical Impact

   •   fatigue and low energy

   •   changes in sleep or appetite

   •   aches, pains, or heaviness in the body

   •   lowered immunity

Cognitive Impact

   •   difficulty concentrating

   •   forgetfulness

   •   intrusive thoughts

   •   questioning meaning or purpose

Relational Impact

   •   withdrawal from others

   •   feeling misunderstood

   •   changes in relationships

   •   fear of further loss

Grief can make the world feel unfamiliar, as though everything has shifted.

The Grief Cycle: Understanding the Process

Grief is often described as a cycle or set of stages. These are not linear and do not happen in a neat order.

Denial

A protective response that helps us absorb the shock of loss.

“This can’t be happening.”

Anger

Anger may be directed at others, life, a higher power, or ourselves.

It often masks pain and helplessness.

Bargaining

Thoughts of “if only” or “what if.”

A way of trying to regain control.

Depression

Deep sadness, withdrawal, or despair as the reality of loss settles in.

Acceptance

Not approval of the loss, but an ability to live alongside it.

People may move in and out of these stages many times. This is normal.

Grief Is Not Just About Death

Many people experience grief without realising that’s what it is.

Grief can follow:

   •   divorce or separation

   •   miscarriage or infertility

   •   childhood trauma

   •   addiction recovery

   •   loss of identity or purpose

   •   estrangement

   •   illness or disability

Unacknowledged grief often shows up as anxiety, depression, anger, or numbness.

How Grief Can Become Complicated

For some people, grief becomes overwhelming or prolonged. This may happen when:

   •   the loss was sudden or traumatic

   •   grief was suppressed or avoided

   •   there were multiple losses

   •   there is a history of trauma

   •   there is little support

This doesn’t mean something is “wrong.”

It means more support is needed.

How to Manage Grief and Loss

Grief doesn’t need fixing, it needs space, safety, and compassion.

Allow the Feelings

Avoid judging or rushing emotions. Grief has its own rhythm.

Take Care of the Body

Gentle routines around sleep, food, movement, and rest matter.

Stay Connected

Isolation can deepen grief. Safe connection helps regulate pain.

Create Meaningful Rituals

Lighting a candle, writing letters, or marking anniversaries can help integrate loss.

Express, Don’t Suppress

Talking, journaling, creative expression, or therapy can help grief move rather than stagnate.

Be Patient With Yourself

Grief doesn’t follow a timetable. Healing is not linear.

How Therapy Can Help With Grief

Therapy offers a safe, non-judgemental space to explore loss at your own pace.

In grief counselling, people can:

   •   process complex emotions

   •   make sense of the loss

   •   work through guilt or anger

   •   understand how past trauma affects grief

   •   reconnect with meaning and identity

   •   learn how to live with loss, not erase it

Grief shared is grief softened.

Living With Loss

Grief changes us, but it doesn’t end us.

Over time, many people find that the pain becomes less sharp, even though the love remains. The loss becomes part of their story, not the whole story.

Healing doesn’t mean forgetting.

It means learning to carry what mattered.

Final Thought

If you are grieving, you are not weak, you are responding to love and loss.

There is no correct way to grieve.

There is only your way.

And you do not have to walk it alone.